


Salacious Palm-on-Palm Action

by CurlicueCal, LaughingStones



Series: Shadowbound AU [13]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Urban Fantasy, Demonstuck, Dirk is real bad at intimacy, Humanstuck, M/M, Panic Attacks, hand-holding, shadows as daemons/familiars, soulbound
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 14:02:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19152502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CurlicueCal/pseuds/CurlicueCal, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaughingStones/pseuds/LaughingStones
Summary: They hold hands. In PUBLIC.





	Salacious Palm-on-Palm Action

Dirk had got all his clever planning on and made sure he and Gamzee arrived at the exhibition when there wouldn't be too many folks getting up in their art appreciation. Gamzee was real fucking pleased about it, because it meant there was only a handful of students wandering the halls of the visual arts building, and hardly any shadow babble to speak of. Left more than enough room in his head to take in the art proper.

It was still public, though, so Hal was curled up all tight and prickle-static behind Dirk's shades. Dirk always had a powerful concern on him ‘bout troubling passersby.

That was fine. Real kind of the brother. Drifting from one painting to another, Gamzee reached out an absent hand to where Kurloz was sprawling up a wall beside him, let that dark touch brush ease back into him.

Wasn't like Gamzee didn't understand the reasoning--didn’t have much concern for the edgy and irritable of strangers, but he got it for sure--but he had to admit to some disquiet on the topic. No hint as to Dirk's thoughts or feelings aside from the flicker of an eyebrow, the barest twitch of his mouth, no extra shade of meaning coming through or side jokes from Hal. It wasn't _bad_ , exactly, just--a prickle-sharp silence he was all unaccustomed to.

Silence from Dirk made Gamzee antsy, all anxious-restless in a way he couldn’t quite put finger on. Made the occasional press of stranger’s shadows feel louder. But then Dirk would make some dry comment about the half-hearted student art piece they were passing, or glance at Gamzee with his head tilted _just_ that way, and everything settled mostly back into place so Gamzee could lose himself in the art again.

Gamzee lingered by a particular vivid painting, wildly clashing sprays of color slathered across the canvas, just letting his eyes get to soaking up all that miraculous bounty of color, and bumped his hand into Dirk's as the brother wandered up to join him.

Dirk jolted away like it was a habit, then stilled and shot him a shaded look that made Gamzee’s heart beat fast at how hard he was to read like this. Almost wanted to bolt himself, but.

He looked Dirk over more directly, turning over that little touch of resonance in his head. Just a glimpse of surface shit, really, all that careful, careful poise that was Dirk, and a flash of something wound up tight and wanting.

“Hey,” Gamzee said with a little smile. “Loverboy. You wanna get on our hand-holding here? All sweet and snuggly like we get to being.”

Dirk’s inscrutable hesitation lasted a moment longer, enough to make an anxious ripple in Gamzee’s midsection, before it up and softened away all at once. He reached for Gamzee’s hand.

“What, palm-to-palm action, right out in public? Scandalous. Licentious even.”

Grinning back, Gamzee wound his fingers through Dirk's and revelled in the quiet little chord of warmth and ease singing through now, threading round the static and stress. “You motherfucking bet, my brother. Gonna shock all these fine folk right back on their fainting couches with our platonic debauchery here. Make ‘em whisper behind their fans and shit, I'm all for it, bro. Hell, I can even smooch the back of your hand real long, get some outrage going here.”

That little bitty smile was hiding in the corners of Dirk’s mouth now and it was upright miraculous the way his whole body curved in towards Gamzee. “Proper outrage requires an audience, you know. Think we can find one?”

Gamzee gave him an innocent look. “But there's a couple fine folks right over there!” Granted, the tall thick brother in the ripped t-shirt and tutu over boxers was more like to deserve that audience than be one, but the nice thing about banter was it didn't have to be much in the way of accuracy.

Attention drawn, staticky shadow energy twitched and prickled along Gamzee’s mind, like a sting on his skin, but Dirk didn’t seem to even notice the flare of Hal’s loosening knot drawing tight again. “Then by all means, debauch away. Cuddle these fingers like a pro. Gimme your tenderest hand-holding.” He stepped casual-like over one of Kurloz’s tendrils, swinging their hands a little as they wandered down the row of student paintings towards the abstract media, shoulder leaning in to settle against Gamzee’s.

“I'm gonna be real gentle, don't worry,” Gamzee assured him. “Gonna deflower your hand with, like, rose petals all the fuck over the place, and candles, and, uh, moonlight pony rides. Yeah. Unload a powerful amount of romance on these cute little fingers. Hope you're up in your readiness at it, bro.”

“So ready, bro.” Dirk’s thumb slid over his and the resonance hummed sweet. “Bukkake my fingers with your romantic wiles.”

“Oh my god,” interjected a familiar monotone. “What is even happening in my ears right now.”

Dirk turned to his brother with a bland expression that didn’t quite erase that little smile lurking there and then turned back to Gamzee. “Oh look. An audience.”

“You're all to being right at that,” Gamzee said, grinning at Dave, and Terezi behind him. “Yo, my brother, what's the haps? You feeling all up on your Victorian maidenhood today? Cuz I'm getting on my ravishment of your big bro's hand here. Gonna steal this cute little palm's cherry.”

Dave made a horrified face and his shadow brosis flared wings and made a noise like _bluh_. At his shoulder Terezi bounced on her toes and beamed. “Dave! Performance art!”

“No,” Dave told his brother, still in monotone. “Stop. Desist. Refrain.”

Gamzee was all ready for that to be the end of that--couldn’t expect Dirk to go up and taking any risks with his loved ones--but instead Dirk lit up through the resonance like a cheerful struck bell and all but snuggled into Gamzee’s side. “But, Daddy, I love him.”

Oh, that was--motherfucking _something_ to hear said all casual and giggle-like. Gamzee snuggled right back, leaned in to drop a kiss at Dirk's temple and grinned all thrilled at Dave.

Terezi’s shadow was darting around their heels now, close enough to make Kurloz grumble and shoot out a warning tendril, but the sister didn’t seem to make note. Terezi herself had turned on Dave, mock outrage not holding up well against her ever widening grin. “You would deny these two young lovers their love? For shame, Dave! What kind of supportive parental figure are you?”

“The kind who isn’t a parental figure?”

Terezi ignored this. “Have you no heart, sir?”

“Yeah, Dave,” Dirk put in. “Don’t you want me to be happy?”

“Am I part of the performance art. Is that what is happening right now.”

“You're all at being a central figure in the play, bro,” Gamzee told him solemnly. “Here we are up in our humility and hope stepped before you for approval, and you gotta take up the burden and decide whether you'll yea or nay us to ride off into the motherfucking sunset, me on my handsome steed here.” He bumped Dirk's shoulder with his.

“Whinny,” Dirk intoned solemnly, and kissed Gamzee’s fingertips. Gamzee just about combusted of sheer delight.

“Dude, y’all one thousand percent have my permission to ride away into the sunset _at any moment_ ,” Dave said, but his shadow was humming with amusement, so he probably wasn’t mad.

Terezi pretended to wipe a tear away from one blind eye. Her shadow had another go at getting her tendrils on Dirk and Gamzee. Sister was handsy.

“Fucking sweet,” Gamzee said, grinning at Dirk. “We got _permission_. You know what this means, bro.”

“I get to wear a white dress?”

“You surely motherfucking may,” Gamzee agreed, “but also, I get to do this.” He turned, relinquishing his grip on Dirk's hand to wrap an arm around his waist, and tipped him backwards as he grabbed for Gamzee's shoulders in startlement. Gamzee bent to kiss him all smug and gleeful.

Dirk’s heart did something uncertain and happy, like a little exclamation point through the resonance.

Someone in the background actually applauded, possibly sincerely or possibly because they were enjoying the show.

“Congratulation hugs!” Terezi screeched, and tackled Dirk and Gamzee at the same time her shadow-sis tried to jump past Kurloz. Kurloz took this not at all kindly, snapping out a limb to bar the way between her and Gamzee with a grumbling growl as Gamzee staggered under Terezi's impact, laughing breathlessly.

Her shadow just cackled, twisting agreeably to the side to lick a tendril up Dirk’s leg. _Aww, he’s so happy,_ she cooed, as Dirk leaned back against Gamzee to eye his new circumstances with mild consternation. Hal’s tight-wound static prickle buzzed like ants against Gamzee’s brain, as he loosened and then coiled tight again, agitated.

Terezi grinned with all her teeth, hands patting at their arms as Gamzee pulled Dirk back upright so he wouldn't get to dropping him. “You taste like orange sodapop and cream,” Terezi informed Dirk, confidingly.

Dirk raised an eyebrow.

“Now there I gotta get on my disagreement with you, sister,” Gamzee started, sneakily reclaiming Dirk's hand in his, but Dave broke in.

“No, nope, a total veto on the whole topic of how various Striders may or may not taste, I'm putting the smackdown on this like you're nails and I'm the hammer, you're slang and I'm strict grammar, I could do a whole rap except I wouldn’t want to intrude on your special intimate moment here. Wait, no, actually I would.”

Dirk looked up from shaking his ankle vaguely as if that would remove the shadow clinging to it. “But Dave. We came here for _your_ special intimate moment.”

“Shit, yeah!” Gamzee said enthusiastically. “Motherfucking art show, like having your most shy little thoughts as hide under rocks all coaxed out and set up nice on cushions, all comfy and spreading out lazy-like, and then you toss 'em out on stage to fry in the spotlights. How you holding up, bro?”

Dirk blinked. “What he said.”

 _God they’re weird,_ Dave’s shadow said in tones of deep approval.

“I’m getting on my artistic exhibitionism like a born kinkster,” Dave replied. “Catch me flaunting all these mad illicit photogs. Flashing my genius. Mingling with the admiring masses. I’m sure they’re around here somewhere.”

“Dave does excellent work,” Terezi told Dirk and Gamzee cheerfully from about two inches away. “I assume. They mostly taste like paper and ink.”

“Your stuff ain’t exactly a feast for the tastebuds either, TZ,” Dave said. “I don’t care what you say. Don’t let her talk you into licking the paintings.”

“That I will not up and do,” Gamzee said, nodding. The low rumble of Kurloz's irritation abruptly spiked, and Gamzee glanced over to see him surge off the wall onto the floor and pool around Gamzee's and Dirk's feet, barely leaving a breath of space around Terezi, and edging in on her shadow. One thin tendril snapped out from him across the line of light between them, invading as Kurloz said _Keep your grasping paws on your own motherfucking turf, interloper, and leave you what is mine to me lest I render you into barest fragments of consciousness._

 _*Adorable,*_ Terezi’s shadow returned. _The *cutest.*_

“Okidoke,” Dave said, catching Terezi by the back of the collar and tugging her away. “Down, girl. Remember what we said about personal space.”

Her sister came agreeably with her, pulling away from Dirk and coiling a tongue of shadow up Dave’s leg instead. _It’s delicious?_

“Dave, I have literally no memory of any such conversation,” Terezi said. “It is probably because I am blind. And very sad.”

Kurloz let the shadow-sister go, humming low and possessive and leaving Dirk exactly one direction to step that wouldn't land him in Kurloz's grip. Nice to know he had his regard on that strong for the brother, Gamzee thought, pleased.

“And a tragic orphan,” Terezi added and Dave swatted her on the head.

“Yo, no ganking my backstory. I’ve _met_ your moms.”

Sister didn’t feel anything but gleeful, but she sure made a show of a mournful face. “Who also never learned about personal space. It’s so sad, Dave!”

“Respect the blind girl’s tragedy, Dave,” Dirk said.

“I’mma text Bro and tell him you got surprise engaged.”

“Whoops, I yield.”

Wasn't any kind of surprise that'd bring him to heel, but Gamzee still felt a little pang at it. Nobody would want to get mistaken that way, though, and who would really get the notion on them that getting all bound up to him for life, for real, would be a good idea? Nobody as clever as Dirk, most like. Dirk glanced his way, little question getting its form on between his brows and Gamzee smiled, leaning over to bump his head on the top of Dirk's shoulder, squeezing his hand once.

They made their way along the rows of art in a friendly group, Dave and Terezi shoving at each other while their shadows rambled private happinesses at their hosts, a pleasant enough noise to have all brushing up against Gamzee’s brain, though one voice felt missed out. Even more pleasant was the way Dirk up and kept hold of Gamzee’s hand, swinging it all casual between them and sticking close to his side like it came natural, even as he turned assessing eyes over the student art pieces hung up in rows. This outing was turning out a sight better than Gamzee had feared, the minimal public all up in their good cheer and Dirk’s soul-touch all soothing-like through his mind. Would have been pretty close to perfect if Hal hadn’t been a tight, buzzing knot of static, locked tight and sending prickles of tension-pain into Dirk’s temples, a faint distress through the resonance. Gamzee wasn’t gonna push his luck though, asking for better than good.

Dirk drew up in front of a black and white photo, leaning in to look at the shadow caught cast in stripes from the light through shutters, a feathering of electric green around its edges the only color present. “‘Is that added in post, or…?”

“Nah, it’s the film. Aura-sensitive media.” Dave tilted his head. “Looks like they did an overlay with traditional film, probably cleaned it up some in development.”

“Huh.” Dirk’s finger traced along the the brighter stripe, hovering just over the print. “I keep meaning to look into that more. The chemistry is interesting, and I know there’s been some cool papers about using it for spectral analysis.”

Dave’s lips quirked sideways. “Lemme do that photoshoot with Hal you keep promising and I’ll give you a primer.”

Gamzee couldn’t see Dirk react, but through the hand wrapped in his, he sure felt that little uncertain jerk of emotion. Felt the needle-prick jolt of Hal’s tucked-away static tightening down even clearer. He bumped his shoulder into Dirk's, hoping to reassure, and grinned all intrigued at Dave.

“You wanna snap some sweet shots of Kurloz, let him get his strut and swagger on? Could give you a fine motherfucking show, I bet.”

Dave’s shades turned his way, face as blank and slouch as casual as ever, but his shadow brosis actually sat up and purred. “That would be pretty okay probably.”

 _We could make some fantastic shots outta that sweet and scary claw-ntrast thing they got going on,_ his shadow mused, head tipping and tail curling around Dave’s ankles. _Get them out at the skate park maybe? What kind of colors do you think?_

Good thing Gamzee had long practice avoiding answering questions as he wasn't meant to hear, cuz he kinda wanted to lay out just how motherfucking snazzy Kurloz's colors were in truth, seen from the other side. All deep rich wines and purples, like a sunset sky after storm.

Dave apparently had something to share back all private to his brosis, because his shadow fluffed out wings behind them a bit and then snickered. _Hmmf. Purrrr-ty sure we can handle that. Or just bring Karkitty along. Or Dirk._ His shadow’s head tipped the other way on the floor. _That might get us some interesting colors._

“Wow, no fair,” Terezi chimed in, stabbing a finger into Dave’s face. “It is extremely rude to steal all the potential art models. I want one.”

“Terezi. You’re blind.”

“Minor details, Dave! I have at _least_ four other senses! Maybe five! Possibly as high as six.” She spun on Dirk. “Let me paint you like one of my french girls.”

“Why do I have the feeling that that would end in me, covered in paint.”

Gamzee busted out laughing at that, set his forehead down on Dirk's shoulder and just giggled. “Ah, motherfuck!” he sighed, and straightened up still snickering. “Vase all gracious in one hand and like, a bowl of fruit or some shit between your legs cuz you're naked and you gotta be to covering up, and like maybe one of those filmy scarves draped all pretty over one arm, and all just motherfucking slathered in pretty colors.” He grinned at Dirk, envisioning it. “Hair all spiked up in a rainbow, shit but you'd be a pretty sight.”

“ _Dirk_ ,” Terezi said intensely. “Say yes.”

“Yeah, no,” Dirk said. “Hard pass on the rainbow party. Work your wiles elsewhere.”

A noisy group of students wandered by--inwardly noisy, their voices were all regular for the setting, but their shadows had a _clamor_ on--and Gamzee winced away a bit, ducking in closer to Dirk. “So hey,” he cut in, looking at Dave, “where's your shit up and getting its display on? Gotta be at admiring the clever shit you've gone and captured in all its colors, bro.”

Dave shrugged and ambled off down the rows, letting them follow after. His quiet seemed to mean his shadow got their chatter on even more, an overlap of noise with Terezi’s sister, but the noise stayed mostly high-spirited, and Terezi split away a couple steps later, went bouncing off to ambush some other hapless brother.

“Ta dah,” Dave said mildly, as he gestured at a cluster of frames. “It’s art. Treat yoself.” His hands were shoved in his pockets, face half averted even behind the blankness of his shades. Between that and the excited-anxious-hopeful thrum of his shadow brosis, Gamzee had the idea the brother might be feeling shy.

He turned to the photos and was distracted enough to wander away from Dirk and barely mind the resonance going.

“Motherfuck,” Gamzee breathed, staring from one photo to the next, blurry backgrounds behind black shadow silhouettes--but not purely black. This one had misty clouds of magenta and lavender weaving down the limbs and coiling into a spiral at the center, that one had jagged streaks like green lightning running through it. They looked exactly like when you went shadow-slipping and saw a shadow on the other side, enough that it made unease creep up Gamzee's spine.

“ _Damn_ , my brother,” he added, looking at Dave all impressed. “Shit if you didn't go and catch on paper what a body can't see except in danger.”

Dave--well the brother wasn’t moving to be at falling still, but the feeling of his shadow’s attention suddenly honing in was something like. “That’s… an interesting way to put it.” Dave’s pokerface was still perfect, his hands still in his pockets, shoulders casually slouched. Black shadow wings mantled ever so slightly on the floor behind him, and a shadow tail flicked once and curled around his ankles. “You jump?”

Gamzee twitched his shoulders like to shudder. “Not of a purpose! But when that's the better chance of what's before us, yeah, my brother's up and taken me through a few times.”

“Huh.” Dave’s head tilted slightly towards Kurloz coiling in sweeping tendrils at Gamzee’s feet, and then he glanced sideways, toward Dirk. “Would have thought you’d be the type.”

“Hell no,” Gamzee said, stepping back towards Dirk to reclaim his hand for comfort. “Like, yeah, my brother's got the strength to ward the rest off, most like, but shit, bro, why'm I gonna be all at testing that? I don't get to throwing myself at motherfucking ravening beasts for a snack.”

Dave’s shadow laughed, and the corner of Dave’s mouth actually quirked up a bit. “I hear that.”

“Who’s throwing themselves at ravening beasts?” Dirk asked as he let himself be pulled in to Gamzee’s side. Gamzee took the opportunity to snuggle a bit.

“You, for a start,” Dave returned. “Him and Bro are both crazy with it,” he told Gamzee.

 _Reckless,_ his brosis murmured, all private aside to Dave. _Don’t think they can get hurt. Or maybe don’t care._

“Crazy with awesome,” Dirk said agreeably.

“You've got your sense on there,” Gamzee told Dave, bumping Dirk's shoulder. “Mad motherfuckers, just waltzing over that line like it's up and got no import to it, no peril to heart and fucking soul!” It was real nice to be able to bitch with somebody about it. Dirk turned an offended gaze on Gamzee and Gamzee glowered right back, huffed all playful.

“Fur-ustrating,” Dave agreed. “In-caw-tious.” He thought for a minute. “...Bird-brained.”

“Has anyone ever told you your girlfriend is a terrible influence,” Dirk said. “And I know what I’m doing.”

 _He really doesn’t,_ Dave’s shadow sighed, and moved to wind in close to Dirk’s ankles, nimbly side-stepping Kurloz as they did so. Kurloz rumbled quietly but let be, since they made no attempt to touch.

“No you don’t,” Dave said.

“I--” Dirk started, and then cut himself short. The knot that was Hal was about as tight as it could go, but the static in Gamzee’s head spiked up painful sharp and held that high note.

Gamzee squeezed Dirk's hand and leaned into him a bit as the resonance tossed him a whole muddle of feelings: defensive annoyance and hurt tempered by a whole load of caution. Couldn't be sure what all that was about, exactly, but Gamzee had less than no interest at sparking a family fight, and considerable desire to avert one, anxiety starting up a quiet gnaw in his gut.

“Well, any case, they're hella fucking cool pics,” he pointed out. Dirk’s emotions were mellowing down to just that careful melancholy. Hal’s static was like needles over his skin. Gamzee didn’t want to step away from Dirk, but he didn't think he could bear that prickle and stab long at all.

“Yeah,” Dirk agreed, looking up from Dave’s shadow lingering protectively close to his ankles, and then to Dave. “Ace work, way to go, baby bro.” He pressed a hand to his cheek, deadpan. “I’m all proud of you and shit.” Aw, his face was doing the irony thing, but his chords through the resonance were soft-edged and fond, muddled warm undertones half-muffling the sharper notes of uncertainty and Hal’s wound-tight prickles.

By Dirk’s ankles, Dave’s shadow set up a silent purr, and a more obvious leaning in of their whole shadow form towards Dirk. Dave shrugged and looked away, brown cheeks flushing rosy-dark just the way Dirk’s did when he was flustered.

It was all hella cute and good to see, except Hal was still curled way too fucking tight and Gamzee'd had just about enough of it. “Hey,” he said low, tugging gently at Dirk's hand. “Can Hal maybe get at being to loosen up just the ittiest motherfucking bit, bro? 'S setting up some kind of powerful prickle and throb in my skull with him all wrapped up like that.”

And Dirk kind of--flinched.

He looked at Gamzee, looked at Dave, looked back at Gamzee and--one blink later he was standing a good step back from everyone, hands tight by his sides, face blank, and Hal locked down into such a tight knot it felt briefly like little needles jammed into Gamzee’s _brain_.

Kurloz stirred restlessly, power and attention coalescing like clouds gathering.

Gamzee glanced helplessly over to Dave, who hadn't moved, only the sudden sharp alertness of his shadow brosis giving away that he was as tense as everybody else suddenly up and was. Shit, this wasn't in the least any kind of thing as Gamzee had up and meant to do.

“I didn't, uh,” he said, looking from Dirk to Dave and back, “I didn't mean as you had to, like, get a distance at you…” He reached out a hand halfway, noticed what he was doing and pulled it back again, tugging and rolling the hem of his shirt instead.

“No, I--” Dirk stopped like his voice had got switched off, mouth working. His hands twitched by his sides, a little aborted motion Gamzee couldn’t interpret. He drew in a breath, shook himself all over, a minute, full body shiver, and his posture pushed into a semblance of ease Gamzee didn’t quite buy. “No, it’s fine I just… didn’t know we were bothering you.” He shrugged apology, hands in his pockets and his gaze kinda… slid sideways towards Dave before his head twitched back Gamzee’s direction.

 _Oh,_ said Dave’s shadow, still stranded in the space Dirk’d been, and then, _Hmm._ Their tail flicked.

Gamzee gave a sheepish shrug. “Only when he's all curled up tight to hide like that,” he says, “brother, you know you don't trouble me none when he's out and free.” That did not seem to help--if anything, set Dirk more into his tension and lockdown. Gamzee shot Dave another bewildered look, because for all he wasn't sure why, it seemed like the brother might have some kind of key to this.

Dave was real, real blank faced, just like his brother. Might be kinda cute, how hush-hush this lot got with their emotions if it weren’t real frustrating just at the moment. Leastways he could get half a read on Dave with his shadow brosis still humming thoughtfully, outline of shadow feathers ruffling and resettling repeatedly.

“Dirk,” Dave started, and Hal’s pinpricks sharpened fierce enough to make Gamzee wince, though he tried not to let it onto his face. Kurloz’s attention honed in another notch, murmur of threat seeping out into the air, and now Dave was glancing sideways their direction.

 _Uncurl him by force, if need be_ , Kurloz murmured to himself, contemplating the tight knot of sharpness that was Hal, _pry him loose of his withholding, strip him bare and gasping in our grip. Easier by far than all this motherfucking chatter._

 _No_ , Gamzee said, unwontedly firm. _Leave the fuck be just now, bro._

Grumbling, Kurloz subsided in surprise, the edge of threat slipping away as quick as it came.

Dave was still eyeing them when Dirk said, rocked back on his heels and hands in his pockets, “Look, I just. Maybe I should go. Catch you at home?” he added, in response to whatever Gamzee’s face did, voice gone all soft and coaxing-hopeful.

 _Dave!_ said Dave’s shadow, and suddenly the brother was stepping in, shoulders all casual, non-confrontational slouch even as he put himself smack in Dirk’s escape route. “Whoa, hey, what even, bro, you can’t go ditching me on my special day, that is hellsa rude, like I’m gonna get a complex, I have low self-esteem, you’ll put me in therapy, and then Rose’ll find out and ambush my doctor and replace her and eat me alive or something.”

They all paused to contemplate this outpouring of words.

“You don’t wanna get me vored, Dirk,” Dave added. “Not cool.”

“Rose isn’t going to vore you,” Dirk said, and if he didn’t exactly look non-tense, at least he looked less like he was gonna bolt at any minute.

“It would be psychological voring. That’s the worst kind of vore.”

“I still don't motherfucking understand why that shit ain't just straight up cannibalism,” Gamzee put in. “Like, eating people's what cannibalism's all to _be_ , so what the fuck?” He gave Dave a nod of acknowledgement. “Like, not the kind what just gets down in your thoughts and the nitty-gritty of you and slurps that up, sure. But fuck.”

“I think it’s vore when it’s sexy,” Dirk said.

“It’s vore when it’s Rose and it’s terrifying,” Dave corrected, and Dirk raised his eyebrows at him. “No. Shut up.”

Dirk waggled his eyebrows up and down.

“Lies and slander. You put those away right this instant. There is nothing sexy about Rose vore.”

 _Nothing they have to know about,_ his shadow agreed, even as Dave pressed a hand over his face. _She’s furry fun to play with._

“I’ve done nothing to deserve this,” Dave muttered, pulling his shades off to clean the fingerprints on his shirt. Not quite glancing up, he added like an afterthought, “You know your boyfriend has kind of a point.”

Made Gamzee all kinds of pleased just to realize after that second of confusion that the brother was up and talking about _him_. He was Dirk's boyfriend, clear enough so's other people'd call him that and Dirk wouldn't argue! Shit but that was nice.

And even motherfucking better that the brother was taking his side of things. He looked all hopeful at Dirk. Dirk just looked tense and vaguely uncomfortable again.

“Okay, no seriously, irony time-out.” Dave turned his full attention on Dirk, not even bothering to replace his shades. “I’m not gonna ask where you got the idea that you’re like, a _burden_ to be around with your shadow-bro and all, ‘cause I do know what that’s about, but this doesn’t have to be some crazy catch 22 all-or-nothing Saw game situation either. People sometimes needing a little space from your other half doesn’t mean everyone always needs all the space, y’know? Like, overstimulation can be a thing, it doesn’t mean sensory deprivation chambers are the end-all solution. Middle ground is a thing that continues to exist in the world.”

“Shit yeah!” Gamzee said appreciatively. “You talk that good sense, brother!”

Dirk was less receptive. “I’m not really sure there’s a happy middle ground to giving strangers migraines.”

“Wow, fuck strangers, who brought them into this, strangers can look out for themselves. Get good or get lost.”

Gamzee completely agreed, but Dirk’s folded arms and the unhappy pressed flat line of his mouth didn’t look like to yield to this logic.

Dave faded back into seriousness. “I really don’t like when you do this, you know.” Dirk stiffened further, opening his mouth as if to say something, but Dave waved him off with a grimace. “No, no, fuck, I don’t mean it like that, I just mean--this. Right here. Like, when was the last time anybody got a migraine from Hal? That shit was back in high school, Dirk. You’re always framing things in the worst possible interpretation, like you gotta short circuit some horrible outcome brought about by you personally and it’s really…”

 _Fur-rustrating,_ his shadow finished privately, even as Dave shook the sentence away, incomplete. _He’s not hearing us._

Gamzee shoved his hands in his pockets, frowning at Dirk. Dirk frowned right back, a tiny little tick of expression that was pure stubborn. 

“Can't say I get it, myself, bro. Like… so maybe your shadow-bro unsettles folks a mite, makes them itchy in their skull-space. Why the motherfuck are you all to giving your care at that?” He looked down at the puddle of tangled, vining shadow around his feet. “My brother makes folk a hell of a lot more than a _mite_ unsettled when he gets the mood on him. Why am I gonna give a single fuck over it, unless they're dear to me and I want them solid in their comfort with me?”

Dave pointed a finger at Gamzee. “See? Him. Listen to your boyfriend, bro. He is way creepier than you. No offense, GZ.”

Gamzee gave Dave a pleased, toothy grin, eyes hooded.

Dirk just hunched his shoulders and looked between the pair of them like he was being tortured rather than told he could loosen up some, no worries. “That’s… different.” Gamzee tipped his head, ready to hear why, and Dirk's shoulders hunched further before he apparently rallied. “And what are you talking about, Dave, you told me we were giving you a headache _last week_.”

“Dude, no. I asked if you could turn it down before I got a headache, as in one specific time, managing my own boundaries, do not need you to manage them for me, thanks.”

“I’m not-- _managing_ you by trying to be respectful of the fact that my shadow brother causes you literal physical pain,” Dirk snapped.

“You--!” Dave cut himself short drawing in a slow breath, then another. His shadow brosis ruffled wings and thrummed a low, purring noise, somewhere between comforting and annoyed. “Okay, look,” he started again, quieter. “This is that thing again. That all-or-nothing shit.” _Cat-astrophization_ , his shadow murmured. “Catastrophizing,” Dave said. “Like you do realize--okay, maybe this is my bad if I haven’t been clear about this, but _seriously_ , bro, you have to realize that no one thinks you’re physically painful to be around. That’s not a blanket state.”

 _Cookies are a sometimes food_ , his brosis mumbled, apparently to themselves.

Gamzee was hard-pressed not to up and motherfucking applaud at like every other sentence coming out the brother's mouth. Funny how just hanging out in passing when Dave would drop on by Karkat's place, Gamzee'd never realized how sharp he was, fully as good a set of wits as his brother and less tangled around his own brain. Might be the reason as he alone of the three brothers struck no soul-sparks off Gamzee.

“I’m allowed to not want to bother people,” Dirk said, but he was starting to sound more tired and confused than certain. Gamzee edged a little in his direction without even thinking, and Dirk’s head jerked around towards him, face surprisingly open in its wary unhappiness. Hal was less clenched-tight now, just that familiar static buzzing, and Gamzee could handle that way better than he could Dirk looking all lost and sorrowful. He took another cautious step in Dirk's direction, offered out a hand for if Dirk was willing to up and palm-cuddle again, and tried not to be too stricken when Dirk shied back another step.

Dirk looked distressed enough for both of them if he was being honest.

He almost didn’t make note of Dave’s shadow’s continued muttering _(...let’s hit this shit from a diffurrent angle…)_ except then Dave said into the weird tension:

“I like being around you.”

Dirk startled, turning.

“And your shadow.” Dave’s voice was matter-of-fact and just a little bit confrontational. His shadow had their attention fixed intensely in Dirk’s direction, tail-tip twitching.

“Shit yeah!” Gamzee chimed in hopefully. “I mean, like, I guess it's all manner of obvious I like you, bro, and Hal too, but I surely do, yeah. And he's all loosened out a little now, so it's all good, there's no more sharpness up at you now, so can we maybe get our closeness on again?”

The static-knot of Hal pulsed, slicing bright and making a liar out of Gamzee almost immediately, but he kept the wince good and clear of his face. Wasn’t hardly a heartbeat til it settled back to that uneasy background buzz so wasn’t like it mattered anyway. Not compared to Dirk all frozen-still between them, and Gamzee couldn’t see his eyes behind his shades to see if he was looking at him or Dave or both, but he was tense all over, breathing short and shallow.

Nothing like what Gamzee had meant to happen, straight up to being the opposite, actually, and no notion to him how to fix this. He looked over at Dave, helpless and hopeful.

“Dude. Are you having a panic attack because people said they like you.”

“ _No_ ,” Dirk said immediately, and hunched further.

“No shade, but you kind of are.” _He really is_ , Dave’s shadow agreed, and their tone was an easier to read version of Dave’s expression--fondness and concern and amusement.

“Lies,” Dirk managed, fairly evenly, and Dave twitched the corner of his lips as his shadow snickered.

“Okay, coolkid, but maybe take some deep breaths or something.” Dave’s voice stayed light, dry, but his glance when it went to Gamzee didn’t quite match. “Just for fun. Go to your happy place.”

Gamzee nibbled on his lip, thinking on if Dirk even had one of those. He still didn't know what all to say as might help, but just as he opened his mouth to get his try on anyway, Kurloz grumbled and swept out a long limb of shadow. It curved around behind Dirk where he stood and wrapped back to Gamzee, penning Dirk in a long, dark loop. If he wanted to shift without crossing Kurloz, he'd have to step closer to Gamzee--not that he seemed like to get his move on in any direction just now.

Gamzee frowned down at Kurloz, not at all sure but as the shadow stepping in might make shit even worse. He gave Dirk an uncertain look, trying to ask without words if he needed Kurloz called off. Dirk’s eyes were on Kurloz, the dark line cutting him off from the world. He huffed a breath, a short, startled noise, something like a laugh, and not for the first time Gamzee wished he could get any kind of read on what all the brother was feeling with Hal all tucked away like this.

But then Dirk was glancing his way, something just a touch softer in the tense lines of his body, and he shuffled half a step toward Gamzee.

Gamzee straightened up, damn near thrilled at that, and hesitated a second if he dared move himself or if that'd just send Dirk all twitchy and nervy again. He didn't want to see Dirk flinch away from him again, couldn't motherfucking stand how it felt, so he just offered out a cautious hand again and waited.

Dirk took the hand and proceeded to tuck himself right in close, still all tense lines and unsteady breath, but Gamzee hardly even noticed with the soft warmth of his skin and the flood of feedback that came with it, an electric push-pull of Dirk’s soul settling in against his. Relief and nerves and tentative want, and a whole overwhelming tangle of other emotions that Gamzee was more than content to let wash through him in eddying currents. He squeezed Dirk's hand, knocked his shoulder against Dirk's and leaned into him, all grateful like it'd been days instead of minutes held tense and concerned.

For his part, Kurloz slid back across the floor, the loop of him contracting around Dirk and Gamzee. He'd move when they needed to get their wander on, but up to then he was pleased to keep Dirk firmly in place.

 _Awww,_ Dave’s shadow purred, and Dave rolled his eyes but didn’t bother keeping the hint of smile off his face. “Need to get out of here? Need your meds?”

Dirk’s emotions kicked and jumped under Gamzee’s hands, but he shook his head a half turn. “‘M good.”

"You sure, bro?" Gamzee said, leaning in a little harder for a sec, all warm-fuzzy-touched at the way Dirk leaned subtly back. "We've seen all these cool colors and shit, can up and get our mosey on homeward now for all of me."

Dirk shrugged and got that stubborn set to him that said he wasn’t budging from a challenge and Gamzee figured it was best to leave be for now. He’d keep an eye out, especially as by the resonance Dirk was still wrought up and only starting to settle.

His glance wandered over to Dave and found the brother watching back at him, near unreadable as Dirk behind the shades that had found their way back into place, but still with that little half-smile. The humming attention of his shadow felt thoughtful.

“Well far be it from me to second-guess how a dude deals with his definitely-not-a-panic-attacks,” Dave said, and Dirk raised a middle finger at him, still leaning against Gamzee.

"Hey, if we're gonna hang out a mite longer," Gamzee spoke up, "let's get over to the crazy fucking sculpture shit, my brothers!"

Dave’s smile tipped up into a full on smirk. “Sure, can’t miss that stop on the must-see tour, bro.” He fell into step easily, bumping his shoulder against Dirk’s before dodging back away from Kurloz’s possessive coils. “Dirk, is your boyfriend going to adopt me? I feel like he’s trying to adopt me.”

“Didn’t you hear? Bro already adopted him. It was brutal. I’m 90% sure he likes him better than us.”

"Aww, hey," Gamzee protested, "that ain't in any way the case, bro! He likes me fine, sure, but he went and found me for you, so's we'd up and straighten our shit out!"

“Denial,” Dirk said. “That’s so sad.”

“You’re doomed, bro,” Dave told Gamzee cheerfully, offering a sideways fistbump. “My condolences.”

Gamzee returned the fistbump with a bemused grin. "It's all to being a way better doom than most others I can think on. Oh shit," he added, eyes widening as they came into view of the next hallway and the sculptures scattered along it. "Hell yeah!"

He lengthened his stride, tugging Dirk along to get to the first cool one, all curved planes of welded metal. From one angle it all up and looked like a tree, but then when Gamzee moved around it he found it took to looking like a man's back, all broad shoulders and slim waist.

"Fucking _cool_ ," Gamzee said, and a brother lingering over by the wall, hella tall and all lanky limbs, with a real nice looking fro, smiled and stood a little taller.

Dave wandered away to go exchange words with the stranger, and Gamzee was left to get his eager investigating on with just Dirk’s comforting familiarness all close in his head for company. In the physical, Dirk followed along with his hand warm in Gamzee’s and his face neutral in the way that meant he was content verging on happy. Caught up in a project at his workbench, or curled up on the couch watching made-for-TV movies. Still unusual quiet, but Gamzee had the soft, settling chimes of the resonance to reassure him that Dirk wasn’t any kind of distressed with the state of things.

Gamzee went and got all up in his admiration over some of the other sculptures, the pottery one as made him wanna touch the crazy patchwork of textures and the metal one all sleek and shining like a tulip wanting to blast off and get to space. He looked over at the brother Dave was chatting with, and sure enough he was keeping a hopeful eye on Gamzee, so the tulip thing must be his too. Gamzee gave him a thumbs up and an impressed grin, and he grinned back all bright and pleased.

Gamzee turned back towards the next exciting piece of art to find Dirk watching.

“You’re having fun,” Dirk noted, and there wasn’t much outward inflection to the words, but the push-pull presence of him where he threaded through Gamzee rubbed like fond velvet, and even Hal’s buzz was loosened down to a softer hum.

"I surely motherfucking am, bro!" Gamzee said, walking straight past the next sculpture, which was all looking like a heap of scrap welded together, and not like the student had put much thought in at it. "I mean, some of this shit just has the inspiration spilling out all over the floor from it!" He waved at the next piece, a subtly off-kilter standing sheet of metal that looked to be melting at one corner.

“Yeah,” Dirk said, turning to consider the indicated piece with his head at a matching angle. “It’s a lot to think about.”

Trust the brother to put it like that, like there ever was a thing he didn't up and overthink. Gamzee gave a kind of noncommittal nod, smiling a bit.

“I’m glad we came,” Dirk added after a moment.

Gamzee grinned over at him in full delight, pressing up against the precious brother. "Motherfuck, my brother, it's a joy to hear you say it." He couldn't help swinging in just for a second to land a kiss on Dirk's lips, sweet and pleased.

Dirk’s soul shivered and chimed sweetly back, and if his face turned away his hand clasped Gamzee's a little tighter. “Well,” Dirk said, flustered like he rarely got in public. “Yeah. Sure.”

Gamzee happily swung Dirk's hand linked with his, and dragged him on to the next art piece.

**Author's Note:**

> Curlicue note: Dave's shadow goes by Dave^2, D-squared, or just D, and I love them with all my heart and soul. They picked up the puns and the tail from Nepeta. :33
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> Some meta about various possible iterations of Dave’s shadow here (davesprite=duty, alpha-dave=rebellion, davepeta=love), and even tho I don’t Tumblr much anymore I’m always open for fic questions.


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